Loners

Last edited Wed Dec 10, 2025, 12:33 AM - Edit history (6)

I never even had a twitter page. It was only when my entire lab signed up for that bloody lousy Facebook thing that I made a page and back in 2007 when it was still .edu.

A lot of people don't want to be out there, known to a lot of strangers etc.

It is not a mental issue or shady or conservative to be reclusive. It’s as if an entire class of personality is only allowed if you are super rich and the rest of us have to pay our dues to these parasitic systems by “being out there and telling your story etc”

Or put up with harassment, slander etc.

One reason I have a lot of sympathy for wildlife is I get why it is stressful when humans clatter in with their cameras, making a lot of noise and stressing wildlife. Influencers who take photos with animals harassing them in their own reserves. Those are loathsome behaviors.

Doxxing people into coming out etc is harassment. Not everyone wants to be out there, having a conversation.

I like to have no conversation with society in general that is not strictly tied to my field.
And okay some light politics on du or discussing books.

I left many rants on DU by now and and they were basically fracked out. I am furious.

It isn’t even anything very lurid or scandalous but on the one hand these emerging systems are awful and annoying in every way and I don’t want to play by their rules and engage with them etc. I want to opt out.

A lot was “fracked” out of me either by nuisances or a kind of silence that’s uncomfortable. I have not yet reached a point of Pulp Fictions “comfortable silence” with various sleazy internet corporations and such .

I am comfy here around duers like CrispyQ etc who remind me of my ex mom in law. Retirees, public school teachers not influencers and creeps and so on.
I like everyone here..but just a random example

I am here because ..well everyone is much older ..I like that. I don’t like people who go clattering all over the place like those loud and noisy people all over the web. Well progressives I like aren’t like that.

A nice quiet place instead of ..yeesh. I had come to make my last post, because I don’t really like talking very much.

A nice thing about places like Physics Stack Exchange is you can’t talk there so the Pulp Fiction primal scream thing doesn’t come up.

I hate tech .
But well I do like DU and I’ll come back in a year and make one line posts rather than outpouring of stuff..I really hated my last workplace.

What is it? That if you don’t pay your dues to society with some sort of awful Calvinistic “work ethic” you should at least clatter about all over the web posting bizarre things?
Yeesh.
I just wanted something simple.


I have always hated being conspicuous. And these lousy systems are so invasive and encroaching yet ..these days more tangibly, but as soon as the larger public starts getting more aware, they want to use that set of morons (and super creepy men) who lower the bar for everyone, to set the standard of what is acceptable. It’s the other way around.

I remember reading an article years ago where one of those Facebook morons said, “Oh you know we are not interested in your private stuff”.
Yeah no…people wear clothes because most people are not nudists not because it’s this reasoning process that goes “Oh am I interesting to a bunch of tech creeps?”
Nobody cares what some creeps are interested in. It is my damn space.
Unbelievably invasive.,
Complaints and a huge conflict are guaranteed..


I have stopped trying to make these sound like some sort of abstract hypothetical or generic bland statement on tech. I don’t think it works.
I am not crazy just really annoyed.
Anyway I am resolutely determined to log off for a year and not get goaded into more rants.

It’s like an entire existence that’s one part that horrible printer from Office Space and the other part all those creeps from Idiocracy. This is hell. And it is not a movie or story.
How can this absurdist hell be real?

The human brain can fathom poverty, disease etc. I tried to cope with humor etc. but I just don’t want to put up with this anymore and I going to get the plug pulled and file all applicable complaints. It’s like one 15 year episode of Black Mirror. That’s not a compliment if you build some sort of horrible tech. Are these people irony challenged. That show was not laying out how things should be.

I ranted elsewhere about Adam Curtis, but one of his documentaries is kinda interesting :

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Trap_(British_TV_series)

That first episode just pisses me off. This is how these guys come up with BS like “everyone is selfish”. Just because their cultish and creepy form of forced cooperation with some people who don’t have the sense to not avoid these things (I don’t know if it’s Calvinism, theocracy, sadomasochism?) doesn’t work it doesn’t mean the humans are seldish; this rot is a model for mental illness etc.
It means that si valley is fundamentally sloppy and not that good at science and that’s true of these creeps where I live as well.
That rosenhan shit is also intended to discount decent psychiatrists and give rhe edge to these assholes pushing garbage cs
these guys ruin progressivism, science, medicine and education..this small subset of creepy people you find at Stanford’s Hoover Institution (that ass Atlas etc), Stanford Hai (that douchebag Pentland), the MiT media lab.
Anyway that’s a last of it.
Oh great..now I have also “weighed in” on this internet rubbish. Well it will just sink like a stone is my hope, complaint filing aside. There will be lots of ink spilt and talk etc by the people who these guys usually have the sense to recruit instead of going and roping some irate random..


Anyway I am going offline for a year. I will be back sounding like my old self I hope..ie quieter and normal.
I plan to file all applicable complaints.

I hate all these creeps and their stupid ai agents and LLMs and etc.


Edit: I wanted to add one final note before shutting up if not forever for a long time. The only thing I have in common with those Si Valley types is hate. I hate them as much as they hate everyone except their manipulative and narcissistic selves. So I dislike talking on the whole. Well I like it when some people talk. I like it when people here or all the people I follow talk. I am not wildly original so I like it when brighter people I like talk. But I don’t like to talk myself. It’s self important and kinda drivelly. It’s driven by exasperation.

But I did want to say that for people so invested in ruling or dominating the world and reality. That is a stupid idea and will lead nowhere but misery. You will cause a lot of collateral damage but as every hubris filled war from Vietnam to Ukraine and every natural disaster shows you just can’t carry out endless conquest ans as is clear by now to me at least, that type of thought process is flawed.

I used to feel drearily like a worldview I don’t have any sympathy for bombards one all the time forcing one to dully inspect ideas and worldview that seemed beyond stupid and awful. It’s a wild ride to be accused of grandiosity when you miserably inspect what seems to be a worldview so grandiose that someone else’s personhood-a person you don’t know and rarely seems to have any real sympathy for -is irrelevant.



But say that was even possible, an eternal conquest with your douchey self and cult at the top of the pile, without ever bothering to understand the world you will never be able to rule the world. You won’t even be able to pull off more realistic manipulation.

More sanely, if you do want to “change the world!” You have to try to understand it first. I have no sympathy for either worldview by now but I can at least understand the latter. Both are kind of arrogant. I could always understand trying to find the least shitty parts of reality to quietly exist in and lending a hand to the people and things that are hurting and worth preserving as opposed to yet another shopping mall or ill conceived piece of drivel.
It’s why I will continue to use DU in a year or so.

Or doing something worthwhile. I started liking science because of people of the Dr Fauci style more than this Si valley douchebag type.

And maybe if you understand the world, you woukd have some ideas on how it can be less shitty. I realize that requires far more humility and quiet immersion etc than the “move first break shit! Annoy everyone in a billion mile radius!” And always thinking everything is some shitty bot come to life or a trainwreck.


But my point is that when all you want to do is figure out how to manipulate people or things, with no deeper understanding of anything. That will invariably yield to chaos. It’s a human thing apparently to project a very human worldview on everything-it’s not restricted to anyone one group. It’s human..conquest and colonization and it invariably turns on itself.

This exceptionally stupid tech billionaire and trump train is of course doomed. But if you only want to swop them out for a kinder gentler version that still is rooted in destruction, force, manipulation (you pull this trigger and this happens, that one and that happens, with no real depth), I can’t see that any future that isn’t a never ending series of reactionary backlashes is possible.
That was my glum two cents anyway.

I have been thinking about that Bob Dylan line “I wish you could stand inside my shoes and for just one moment I could be you, you’d know what a drag it is to see you”. That’s how that entire fatuous network of tech creeps of Stanford/MIT/Harvard/Yale/Cambridge/Oxford/UCL/Dartmouth/Berkeley/Google/Facebook makes me feel. Let alone even more Nazi and batshit crazy, bombastic versions like Musk and Palantir. It shouldn’t have been that anything short of trump and musk was acceptable during that ghastly and awful neoliberal era preceding these creeps. And whatever the brand you have to look at the ideas and dynamics.
This world domination shit is really stupid. And threadbare..

Nothing in science or reality works this way. Not even the least broken parts of the marketplace (which isn’t much by now) works this way.
I really don’t get it. How this Solaris’ bombarding the ocean with radiation style of thinking works. And this desperation for ai and other things that don’t work..
I saw this sad shit just yesterday/ These people are all delusional and out of touch with the world around them/ more importantly they don’t understand that a fatuous replacement of every type of govt expert or publicly funded scientist with this type of moron won’t last or work:
https://www.nbcnews.com/tech/tech-news/ai-progress-surges-researchers-struggle-explain-rcna247693


Anyway the short answer is that you are welcome to go and pollute every part of the world as long as you stay away from me because I am not kidding around. I will be filing the most serious complaints I can about the whole thing/ this is not the scientific method or medicine.
I don’t know what it is except greed and hubris to quote Jon Stewart’s remark made what seems many lifetimes ago about the Iraq War.
I feel nostalgic about the Iraq War.

There are limits to growth and denying that and forcing every damn person into this disgraceful dreck exploiting every new crisis for more junk growth/ again I am shutting up but I did want to say that one last time/ I don’t really talking like this/
Please don’t recruit from the nih postdoc pool for these stupid things. That’s very stressful to a quiet type of person who isn’t this awful racketing racketeering attention seeking lousy type of person that grifts and flourishes these days.
You are not going to find any influencers in that pool except the Trumpers and the types of people who don’t hate every “pi” you find in bed with Google, Edx, edtech etc.
If peope are struggling with science these are the worst damn ideas. It’s adding insult to injury after ruining education and healthcare with privatization to pretend that some Trumpy meninist types in any part of the world annoying the shit out of some woman trying to lead a life of quiet desperation is somehow a conversation/

I do talk to DU..but that’s different. It has underground in the name of the site/ but it doesn’t mean some sort of creepy spooky underground. Even people who are loud clattering nightmares do connect. Adam Becker talks about Star Trek. I used to like my colleagues (prior to the Fall of 2011). And in recent years I am slowing rebuilding a sort of life at a snails pace and I don’t want these things or people hogging everything and piling on again.
There is gate keeping like the wealthy do it.

And then there is not rampaging about everywhere like that Mr Beast or ..never allowing anything quiet or ..
Most people of this type don’t like cameras or the Kardashians or this world view that any attention or money (no matter what the source) is a positive thing. And a sad imitation of that by the very people who promoted or promote all this used against those they victimize, that is snooty gatekeeping. Which goes hand in hand in my experience with this crass greed for power and influence.

Anyway.

Edit: Because, I have made a reference to serious complaints that will follow for sure at this point, I wanted to point out that it’s not about wanting a safety proofed world helicopter parent style. I am an only child but my mom, anxious as many things I would do, made her, thought people should learn on their own. That is correct. There is no perfect safety etc.
Both reality and online stuff are dicey enough as is. I was thinking of random pranksters like this guy (a dubious style but well, okay it’s an art form I suppose):

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Phil_Hendrie_Show

Or the genuinely malicious Project Veritas.
There’s undeniably always some malice directed at progressive movements -deliberate or if it’s the nature of the thing I don’t know.
I am sure every counter culture movement has been infiltrated by national security types at some point ( Richard Aoki, Justine Tunney etc come to mind). I am not saying that so people are more paranoid. Hey, like The Purloined Letter maybe I am one of those people?! No. That’s silly. I am just an irate older woman who is sick of various things and wants a quiet life.

But the real point is that, some real checks and regulation against these guys like Lina Khan was bringing in are at this point the only fix.
The sheer scale of resources they have whether it is these giants or small creepy companies exploiting this deregulated environment to send creeps into one’s street, make free with the space in one’s own home.

This is not super safety culture etc. these guys are creepy accelerationists engaged in a massive rip off. The whole thing needs to be shut down and kicked out till they can come back with proper regulated stuff.
I wouldn’t say it if it was a minor trivial thing or a smaller nuisance/ I tolerate those.

These are serious nuisances and they suck away your time and life and resource and change your life. It’s in no one’s interest and by understanding the world I don’t mean their creepy little “researchers” like Facebook and Hai of that loathsome Stanford or the creeps of the MIT Media lab.
I mean NiH researchers from another era who would be more like my former colleagues and not these creep types.
You kinda have to be human to know what I mean.

It’s why I post here. Anyway I can’t rant all day. That’s it for now. I’ll be back in a year.
I’ll be back on DU Jan 2027 with my paper done and dusted and on my way to filing complaints quietly. hopefully Trump and the tech creeps will be on their last legs with this pathetic ai and big data boom etc having died.
🖖
(i was more an X files than Star Trek fan but I get the general idea)


Anyway I didn’t start this or any of these posts that aren’t about generic impersonal politics to drivel on. I wanted to include Microsoft (I don’t mind DuckDuckGo/protonmail/cleverbot)/Apple/Cisco/Intel/Oracle/Alibaba/tencent/Tata/Infosys/Mahindra/anything Reliance etc etc -I can’t possibly list every creepy little tech co ever dammit-in short every giant and small creepy “indigenous” or foreign tech co shilling ai/big data /whatever new disgusting creepy nuisance of no use to man or beast.

If I signed up for something it would be like my main lab approved (my real mentor wasn’t enthusiastic about the tech creeps ever..) or my friends approved.
I use this board because I trust EarlG/elad. I try not to have a series of broken relationships irl by from the start not engaging with shady types.
I didn’t need a decade. I took a dislike to my last employer immediately and that was sane.
If it looks shady and feels shady, it probably is and it’s because of those creeps in ai etc

And nuance etc blah blah aside, this has been ott for 14 years. I am filing complaints against my city and state for refusing to shut off this street and this space to blatantly creepy experimentation this late in the day.

I use marijuana medically and a tentative push to legalize it shouldn’t be coupled to all sorts of sleazy things that try to pile to legitimate products (like my medical MJ which helps me repair my brain and I am not proving that to some creeps) sans some shady pile one who shill reefer madness on the one hand and other computer based garbage like that loathsome misogynistic malpracticing Stanford psychiatry or similar while forcing games and street maps and traffic studies and so much predatory BS

I used to worry that these guys will harass my delivery guys or someone like that to make me tolerant of these lousy experiments and it won’t happen. Women would never have had serious rights if that bullshit girlboss shit of cooperating with these detestable men was a thing. I am not a misandrist. I joke about Solanas etc

But it’s either a lying and sleazy or scared human or a bot that would work with these awful creepy guys and their BS
My street and home should be shut off to all stuff that’s not tied to literal deliveries on this street or oblivious stuf
I am filing complaints wherever knowing data scientists or these creeps driving vehicles drove or walked down this street between 2021 and 2025 and going forward.

I am not worried anymore and I am filing complaints. I merely made points about nuance etc etc to point out that I try to be a nice person and see nuance etc etc
This is bullshit though.

While my mentor and colleagues at my last workplace were merely annoying and cultish in expecting people to accept these stupid tech creeps as some sort of punishment for being.a human female..they aren’t exactly the most forward thinking or progressive or feminist people. But they weren’t bad. Just kinda annoying and awful like Joan from Joan is awful.

But the most pf these guys only a few of whom I interacted with and immediately usually knew ..No. they really are pushy backward predatory and awful. You wouldn’t like them either for any generic you. Apple is awful but that one ad they had depicted something universal about the opting out as did the pokemon lawsuit

You wouldn’t want your home filled with ads and streets with influencers etc as some disgusting trashy take on UBI. Or whatever bullshit these parasitic criminals in tech pitch
It’s not an ad. But I recommend Adam Becker’s book on these creeps.
He thinks like a normal scientist. That entire collection of dimwitted douchebags at Stanford MIT etc think like morons. And you should’nt need a neoconservative like Curtis or some other family values shill to point it out solely.
So annoying. How would atomization not be better than the most bullshit take on community etc

These guys pervert everything and turn that into a product and spectacle. I am here because Du is a grassroots explicitly democratic community. Any honest conservatives should try to fix their side of the aisle instead of forcing their values on feminist (not the Taylor Swift or Beyonce or celeb kind but women you would never know or meet since .ordinary dull women who still aren’t this stupid and crazy) women and eveyone dammit
It’s a damn cult. Thats what it is..those fatuous tech creeps.
I think that’s it. Go away and annoy just about anyone else and it isn’t a mental health issue.
You can keep being a frog in boiling water
I didn’t wear tshirts or have bumper stickers as much but I knew what things meant and this looked like the worst damn idea ever and at least during trump 2.0../
Seriously have you no shame? Have you no sense.?

Sorry..I will see you guys on du in Jan 2027 when I will try to quietly blend in as I plan to do in science as well instead of ..thank god everyone has no attention span.
Theee are some oped writers like Ed Zitron or Yasha Levine even I like (hate the term influencers..that is a tech creep term). But I am not anything but a frustrated human.

I can’t believe that in real time you can turn the average random white collar professional who leads some sort of quiet life, has a few political opinions etc into an endangered thing while their space and time are hijacked by people with no products or services but snoop around tryint to repurpose your life for their ends and obviously will be creepy and regressive and pushy and not have the normal sense of ick that all those maligned bureaucrats and regulators in the public sector who are more sympathetic to the random person without policing them (ie leave marijuana out of it at least now you aasholes. And i like to support one or two small vegan cos. We know a few small mom and pop stores or decent small businesses (already known to me-no more!). Must everything be explained to these morons?)
Surely that was clear enough? I can’t do an endless if else or thing for assholes and sleazebags who play dumb deliberately this much. I have to go work finally..
And this piece of junk can grace the Idiocracy that is net. Sorry EarlG/elad. Not exactly a poster child for the community right now.
But I swear if you knew you would be more sympathetic.

It was so annoying. These guys just ignore things and won’t take no for an answer without attacking you as somehow at least broken. I never had a Cassandra complex but it’s not my fault that so many people who should know better don’t see how sleazy these guys are when they have a cs degree or not even that and some lousy over valued start up as they fleece society. There may even be one or two acceptable things in theew but it would be that rare. Mostly it’s just the worst way to do things and well above my pay grade which is why I blame actually elite but passive people for not checking these mediocre creeps who become CEOs etc at the Unic level instead of lionizing such fatuous crap while straining everyone else. And hogging more and more and more.
They want every last thing and it’s when you overreach that much that brushback is guaranteed. Any further encroachment or lies wrt me will only make me eventually file even more serious complaints. But I can’t keep doing this. I have to go work.