Writing

Not quite. I don’t really like prodding opaque things. But while I did want to be clear that I totally pushback and file honed and targeted complaints, I would have an explanatory script of my own and it would be based in the reality of what happened and its distant/root or direct causes. But without any sided bs.

I am not impressed if some little huckster your henchpeople have on their payroll came and showed me this:

https://www.hkproject.org/cryptography/cryptoeq.html
Well it seems like an interesting field actually. I like locks and keys and walls etc. Not as people’s brains have been perverted into perceiving symbols like those as anti-populist. Would you not want a locked door or barrier separating you from Marc Andreessen?
Can’t we be woke a little more strategically. The one thing I learnt in this period is the weird path of any legit wokeness in something gamed to make you do less woke things you fail to recognize as non woke, the same way the cons are putting on display their view of survival of the fittest by choosing bloviation, getting away with stuff and prostitution.
In this opaque hairball of data, information transmitted via different media systems using sound, light, ai, meaning gets perverted.


Alright Prof Hennessy…if you ever see this you should take these meandering diatribes as almost a compliment. You are my favorite insane computer scientist!

You scare me the way even the nicest people roughly like you scare me, where I know that absent all sexual harasssment/creepiness or ott fraud, I may end up in contractual obligations that are net a rip off.

Whatever the deal is in the US (in places like the best parts of what I saw and recognized as something different, but not creepy or shady), India is not ready for this at scale. And importantly, as I will very definitely and faster than anyone would guess based on this (I was hobbled by Prof Hennessy’s henchpeople and assorted disparate scoundrels!) file complaints against my city/state and some other entities, but I will do it properly.
This would be filled with intrusive sexual and other forms of harassment specifically of women (and women with less power and say than me..this is why I sometimes avoid the women etc in these things ..save for your fellow travellers from the two labs I saw, who were definitely not like that. But probably ..yeah I don’t get those people. What I find especially embittering is how these people who are always so slow to see through obvious bs, usually drag one to hell with them, while adroitly staying out of trouble themselves. Tech will save the world..what a load of bs..).

And this would also skew towards harassment of low power male employees (especially probably those least likely to be offensive) who are monitored to loathesome extents to “prevent sexual harassment “(translates to: to protect the sleazy ceo from liability) while leaving the basically harassing dynamics on.

I am a friend to the working man! Hey you idiot hackers..morons..you meninist idiots. Don’t attack me please. I am trying to get something moving here.


The creeps and sleazebags aside, I do seriously have a word for all of you online - you are all hopeless. I am having a genuine crisis.
I got a headsup and this is too much of my life and stuff and above all my livelihood and health.
I am not just handing them over to such poorly constructed systems and I am trying to figure out how they connect back to something in reality which is like the stuff Yasha Levine or Chris Ketcham or Adam Becker trash.

They are all white and male. But they are all specific humans at odds with these systems.

I consider it a very generic and unimaginative worldview when it doesn’t take out the people who contribute to the dynamics of this shitty stuff.

I sometimes see some other women, other Indians etc of whom I have unflattering views and think “This is the type of person Prof Hennessy would like.” It is why I avoid the type of girlboss or presumably hyper reputation conscious woman I assume is Prof Hennessy’s ideal scientist. God that would be hell.. My brain broke for a while and I defaulted to thinking like “The type of healthy female scientist predicted by Prof Hennessy”. God that was hell..that woman is an idiot. For 14+ years I have been reflexively trying to behave like “The Ideal Female Scientist as Rendered by Googlel”, “The Female Scientist who Learns and Educates Creeps about A Feminine Perspective on Science as Rendered by Indigenous Male Creep.”
Oh ffs..I find almost all of tech a risible joke.

And since every part of that thought process repels me, I have inadvertently given a realistic seeming impression of “Mental Patient with Some Kind of Horrible Complication of Undiagnosed and Probably Debilitating Disorders.”

Oh well..I was so focused on my real dark secret..Being a Mediocre Scientist, the Mental Patient thing took me by surprise.

But it is a shitty dynamic and one I will file very negative feedback about.

Such shoddy procedures …that chestnuts like “the Stigma of mental illness” can be exploited by corrupt powerful corporations like Google and with incompetent and unscrupulous shrinks tagging along, to slander someone’s mental fitness for having serious and legitimate complaints is a red flag. This is a corrupt, parasitic and failed model of immigration, privatized healthcare/education and science.

Well it will take a while to shakedown. I will abort it with care though. But at least in India, it would be beyond unwise to force this. And all I can do is warn people.
That aside, I should start the process of getting back to science. The politics would probably be easier to address systemically later.
By now it should be easier.

Well that is it for now. I honestly dobt feel human when i dont work on my own field.
I shall set aside the week-end for anything online if I can think of anything.

I will start a structured restart again from this point. I couldn’t stand what I intuited mechanically must be the default mode network of the people you presumably know Prof Hennessy. A large enough part of science especially is not rote mechanical work.
There was a lot of real learning here. But that should not yet again be sabotaged by people i avoid.
This was an inelegant mess and I am (fittingly 🙄 a part of it.
I shall start putting my work and life in order so I can deal with these insane systems.