General Discussion

Autism can lead you misread a situation, miss a social cue, or impulsively try to communicate something in a way that ends up misinterpreted.

How you act when it's pointed out to you how others are interpreting what you said or did is about your character, not your neurodivergence.

I'm autistic as well. It's, as you say, not an excuse not to give a shit about the impact your words and actions might have on others.

I used to work in a supermarket when I was in college and it just felt better to punch in numbers on the keyboard using my middle finger. When someone pointed out to me that it sometimes looked like I was flipping the customers off, I apologized, explained that that wasn't my intent, and stopped doing it. Easy peasy.

Most autistic people build a social programme that they run in lieu of intuitively knowing how to handle social situations. Whether or not you are willing to accept feedback and tinker with and improve your programme is generally within your control and comes down to your attitude and values, at least when we're talking about people who are verbal and not intellectually disabled.