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History of Feminism

KitSileya

(4,035 posts)

5. It's the soft no.

Reply to redqueen (Original post)

Mon Mar 3, 2014, 11:26 AM

Mar 2014

It's the way we've been raised to never reject outright. I read a great blog post on that once, about how society continually teaches us to never say a clear no - and then demand that we say a clear no in one, very specific situation - as we're about to be raped. I wish I could find that blog post again...

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BainsBane pointed out how many women said "Sorry" when rejecting the dude in that video (HOF THREAD) [View all] redqueen Mar 2014 OP

You and Bains are right. It is so ingrained in me that I don't even hear it. n/t seaglass Mar 2014 #1

Exactly, it is very deeply ingrained. redqueen Mar 2014 #4

I didn't see the video ismnotwasm Mar 2014 #2

Not even a tiny bit. nt redqueen Mar 2014 #3

It's the soft no. KitSileya Mar 2014 #5

I'd love to read it. redqueen Mar 2014 #6

there's quite a bit about that in Captain Awkward's advice column/ blog bettyellen Mar 2014 #7

It is found, with a lot of help from a Shaker. KitSileya Mar 2014 #8

"The answer is to change the culture" ismnotwasm Mar 2014 #10

The ones who claim to strike out because they are "nice guys" BainsBane Mar 2014 #11

The soft no is used against women. cinnabonbon Mar 2014 #9