Religion

The Velveteen Ocelot

(123,002 posts)

1. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat,

Fri Apr 5, 2019, 06:06 PM

Apr 2019

I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’

“Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? 39 When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’

“The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’

Matthew 25:34

And people revere this book?

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2 Kings chapter 2 [View all] Cartoonist Apr 2019 OP

For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, The Velveteen Ocelot Apr 2019 #1

Which is it then? Cartoonist Apr 2019 #3

It's whatever you want it to be. The Velveteen Ocelot Apr 2019 #4

That's the problem Cartoonist Apr 2019 #6

Oh, I don't know. Everybody likes to make fun of Leviticus. The Velveteen Ocelot Apr 2019 #20

Well, in one case Lordquinton Apr 2019 #5

I never quite understood that story. The Velveteen Ocelot Apr 2019 #7

Maybe Elisha... uriel1972 Apr 2019 #8

It said the bears tore into 42 *of* the children, which suggests there were more than 42. The Velveteen Ocelot Apr 2019 #18

42 children Lordquinton Apr 2019 #9

I don't think they ate them Cartoonist Apr 2019 #10

That makes more sense. Lordquinton Apr 2019 #11

These were superbears Cartoonist Apr 2019 #12

They weren't forebears Lordquinton Apr 2019 #15

And they were she-bears. The Velveteen Ocelot Apr 2019 #17

I can't bear it anymore Lordquinton Apr 2019 #22

One was the Queen of Shebear Voltaire2 Apr 2019 #27

I didn't know bears were organized in a monarchy Lordquinton Apr 2019 #35

Smarter than the average bear? Pope George Ringo II Apr 2019 #16

"With God, all things are possible." - Jesus. nt. Mariana Apr 2019 #14

There's only one species of bear that's native to the Middle East, The Velveteen Ocelot Apr 2019 #13

Old Yahweh put the magic in them. Voltaire2 Apr 2019 #24

Maybe they were the last local descendants of the grizzlies from the Ark? Pope George Ringo II Apr 2019 #29

In that area there are only Syrian brown bears, which are relatively small as bears go. The Velveteen Ocelot Apr 2019 #19

It's like every depiction of dinosaurs being T-rexes Lordquinton Apr 2019 #23

Maybe just the bald christians! justhanginon Apr 2019 #2

Elisha was an Old Testament dude, so not Christian. The Velveteen Ocelot Apr 2019 #21

Same god. Voltaire2 Apr 2019 #25

Well, yeah, but just because Elisha told God to set bears on the children The Velveteen Ocelot Apr 2019 #30

You seem to be claiming that we have to apply Voltaire2 Apr 2019 #32

Not at all, I'm just making jokes. The Velveteen Ocelot Apr 2019 #33

It's also a safe bet all the other miracles Elisha performed were just made up as well Major Nikon Apr 2019 #34

Too bad Elisha didn't have a combover like T-rump Sanity Claws Apr 2019 #26

My favorite Bible story of all! MineralMan Apr 2019 #28

Bethel? edhopper Apr 2019 #31