The DU Lounge

This grief is absolutely fucking nuts.

His passing was a trigger for every past trauma. I crashed out in the year 2000 with serious major depression that took me a few decades to completely recover from, and now it's back, and it's scaring the hell out of me. I don't have the strength to help myself out of this and I'm literally hiding from my wife because I can't put her through this.

So I type here to people I've never met in person.

My dog's passing is understandable to me on an intellectual level, but not on an emotional level. And his passing is just a trigger for everything else that has happened in my life.

I need a shrink. Haven't seen one in years (he's now retired), and I don't have the energy to try to find another one.

I've always been a Christian, but not a hardcore one. I'm reaching to to my perception of who God is, and I feel guilty for even doing that because I feel like I'm developing "foxhole religion"...using faith as a crutch because things are grim right now.

This shit is just too horrible for words.

Your words hit me right in the heart...in a good way. Thank you.

I'm going to back off the PC for a bit. I have to get my body moving. Heading a few doors down to take care of a woman's downed tree limbs.

I appreciate you, Jill.