I had a deep, profound conversation with my wife this Sunday morning. [View all]

Her: I ordered myself some new socks this morning online.

Me: Oh, that's nice.

Her: I bought two new bras too.

Me: That's good.

Her: They were on sale. $25 a piece.

Me: That's good.

Me: I don't know how you women walk around with those things.

Her: What things?

Me: Breasts.

Her: What do you mean?

Me: I dunno. Seems like they would be a pain in the ass. And then you have to wear a bra...I dunno...seems like a lot of work to me.

Her: It's probably not as bad as having to walk around with a penis.

Me: It's not the penis that's a problem.

Her: What is the problem then?

Me: The testicles.

Her: Why?

Me: When men age, gravity takes over, and you end up sitting on them.

Her: Really?

Me: Yes. That's why you hear me randomly scream once in awhile.

Her: I didn't know that.

Me: Yeah, when I test drove the new car, I had to ensure that the seats were at the right level so I didn't sit on my nuts when getting into the car. That was my main criteria when choosing a new car...that I didn't sit on my nuts when getting in.

Her: Wow.

Me: Yeah.

Her: Well, I'm off to church. I'll see you later.