The DU Lounge

I feel fine, and, according to their readouts, I am not fine.

I will keep in close touch, and do what they tell me. You see, I have this really hot girlfriend, even married her some 44 years ago, and I'd really like to stick around with her for a couple of decades more, if possible.

I hear some cool jokes over here. A guy from Poland once told me this one (I have posted it before, fair warning):

A polish guy was walking along the beach on the Baltic near Gdańsk, and found an old oil lamp on the beach. He picked up, and rubbed some of the debris off, when a genie appeared. The genie explained that he had three wishes, and the genie would grant him all of them. He asked anything? and the genie confirmed: anything. OK, said the Polish guy, for my first wish, I wish for the Chinese Army to invade Poland. The genie gulped, but said, OK, I am required to grant you that wish. And for your second wish? The Polish guy said he wanted the Chinese Army to invade Poland again. The genie shook his head, but said, alright, and for your third with? The Polish guy said he wanted the Chinese Army to invade Poland a third time. The genie was not happy with this, but was bound to grant the man's wishes. However, he said he begged the man WHY, as a Pole, he wanted the Chinese army to invade Poland three times in succession? The man answered, "for the Chinese army to invade Poland, on the way they would have to lay waste to all of Russia on the way three times."

Another Pole, back in the Soviet era, told me that if fleas had bio-luminescence, then Moscow would look like Las Vegas.

The Poles are not overly fond of the Russians, as a generalization.