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wnylib

(26,294 posts)
34. If you find yourself in a bad situation,
Tue Apr 14, 2026, 08:12 PM
Apr 14

trust your gut and don't be afraid to get away as quickly as possible, however possible. Take reasonable risks to get away if necessary.

An example from when I was 17 and escaped from what would have been a kidnapping and sexual assault.

It was a Saturday morning in summer, 1967. I was waiting at a bus stop on the corner of the block that we lived on. A light green Mustang pullled up to the curb and the driver asked if I wanted a lift. That did not sound at all unusual to me. My father often offered a ride when he drove by that bus stop if he saw a neighbor waiting for a bus.

I could not see the man clearly, but the only person that I knew who had a light green Mustang was the realtor who was handling the sale of my parents' house. I had babysat his kids a few times.

So I got into the car. When I saw the man's face, it was NOT our realtor. His eyelids were droopy, and what I could see of his eyes looked a little glassy. His face was bristly, like he had not shaved in a couple days. But he pulled away from the curb before I could get back out of the car.

My body and mind went on full alert. He asked where I was going and I said downtown to meet some friends who were waiting for me. (A lie.) He said we would take a ride first and patted my leg. I said, "I think you've got the wrong idea." His voice got surly and mean. He said, "Hey, girlie. You don't get something for nothing. It's time you learned that."

While we were talking, my mind was rapidly trying to figure out how to get out of the car. I knew that I had to get out ASAP, before he drove too far or I might never get away.

I knew that there was a 5 point intersection a couple blocks ahead. He would have to slow down there to a near stop or full stop. I lifted my purse to my right shoulder and leaned against the passenger door as if I was relaxing so that I could touch the handle without him seeing me do it. When we reached the intersection, I opened the door.

As I was getting out, he grabbed my left wrist in his hand. I have very small wrists. I turned my arm and hand so that my wrist slid right through his hand and continued stepping out of the car. The car was still moving, although slowly, and I almost fell into the street. But even if I had fallen, there were a lot of people at that busy intersection so I could have screamed for help if I needed to.

I regained my balance and ran all the way back to our house, breathless and trembling. Locked both doors. My parents were not home. I did not go back outdoors until my boyfriend got off work and came to pick me up.

It did not seem dangerous to me to accept a ride from someone I knew. But when I realized that it was a stranger who looked freaky, instead of panicking, I looked for an opportunity to get out soon and did not let the fact that the car was still moving stop me. After the fact, I realized that I should have looked inside the car at the driver before getting in. But by a freaky coincidence, the car was exactly the same as the car of someone I did know. I was too young and trusting to think that it could be a stranger.





Recommendations

3 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

Most sexual assaults are not stranger abductions. yardwork Apr 14 #1
Yes, taught to be nice is abig one. Figarosmom Apr 14 #4
Exactly! yardwork Apr 14 #5
You will notice that I did not limit my OP to sexual assaults only. niyad Apr 14 #20
Yes more women are abused by someone thwy trust Lifeafter70 Apr 14 #24
Times change and we live in a world of privacy violations jfz9580m Apr 14 #38
When my daughter was 12 Figarosmom Apr 14 #2
Brava! Congrats to her! You must be very proud of her! SheltieLover Apr 14 #6
Sure am!😊 Figarosmom Apr 14 #13
Excellent! I wish all parents did this. niyad Apr 14 #19
Same here. My daughter was a black belt at age 13. Irish_Dem Apr 14 #26
Yeah funny how that works, the politeness factor. Figarosmom Apr 14 #36
My daughter is 4ft 10in and 95 lbs. Irish_Dem Apr 15 #44
I taught taekwondo to children and adults oberle Apr 14 #29
I had friends that trained Figarosmom Apr 14 #35
Thank you for all that you have done. niyad Apr 14 #37
My daughter loved it. Irish_Dem Apr 15 #45
Worry more about partners, "friends," and creepy bosses, Ocelot II Apr 14 #3
Yes! SheltieLover Apr 14 #7
You will notice that I did not limit my OP to sexual assaults only. niyad Apr 14 #21
I don't remember what SING stands for LearnedHand Apr 14 #8
I think it's Solar plexus, Insole, Nose, Groin EdmondDantes_ Apr 14 #11
Thanks! LearnedHand Apr 14 #12
Watch Miss Congeniality! MorbidButterflyTat Apr 14 #25
That's where i first learned about it lol LearnedHand Apr 14 #33
I like that dye idea, like in money robbed from a bank EdmondDantes_ Apr 14 #9
But Swalwell knew what was right and wrong JI7 Apr 14 #15
Not enough to not be an abuser EdmondDantes_ Apr 14 #16
Teaching men and boys not to be abusers is great. How long is that niyad Apr 14 #18
My fantasy is that men are barred from owning any weapon. Irish_Dem Apr 14 #27
Sadly, the way things are going in this misogynist, patriarchal niyad Apr 14 #28
Yes women's rights are going by the wayside. Irish_Dem Apr 14 #30
A man that SA women I_UndergroundPanther Apr 14 #42
My point is I don't think simply giving women tools is enough EdmondDantes_ Apr 14 #31
All very interesting. But PLEASE notice that I specifically mentioned niyad Apr 14 #32
Any physical boundary violation when a woman says no. Irish_Dem Apr 15 #47
I agree there will need to be a multi-layered approach. Irish_Dem Apr 15 #46
cell phones. mopinko Apr 14 #10
The biggest threats are those we know and agree to see JI7 Apr 14 #14
??? niyad Apr 14 #17
Women need to be empowered to fight back. hamsterjill Apr 14 #22
Looking self-assured and aware certainly helps. In a similar discussion niyad Apr 14 #23
If you find yourself in a bad situation, wnylib Apr 14 #34
Yes, trust your instincts! I am so very glad that you did exactly that, niyad Apr 14 #39
Yikes 😳 MustLoveBeagles Apr 14 #40
So am I. It seems even scarier to me now that I'm older and wnylib Apr 14 #41
Good for you! YES, always trust gut instinct! SheltieLover Apr 15 #43
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