General Discussion

MorbidButterflyTat

(4,363 posts)

115. Instagram and Facebook

Mon Feb 23, 2026, 03:03 PM

Yesterday

don't have privacy settings? Block features?

Not much sense waiting around for society or culture or karma to miraculously change predatory males into decent human beings.

And since children must access social media because reasons, wouldn't being proactive with privacy settings make more sense?

“Do y’all females ever tell ur homegirls ‘Sis chill you letting too many dudes hit?’”

Obviously there were no guardrails whatsoever to keep this gibberish from getting through.

Delete. Block. Use privacy settings.

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marble falls

198 replies

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I am a 15-year-old girl. Let me show you the vile misogyny that confronts me on social media every day [View all] marble falls Yesterday OP

Social Media Has Made Society Worse Than It Was ProfessorGAC Yesterday #1

Indeed. And we raise our men terribly. marble falls Yesterday #2

That reminds me of a remark soldierant 18 hrs ago #189

There is a cure for all these, but no one wants to do it...UNSUBSCRIBE to ALL of it! That is the CURE! Escurumbele Yesterday #24

Ok By Me ProfessorGAC Yesterday #57

Good idea but not realistic blubunyip Yesterday #70

Because we let them. Because there is no credible protest against this. Because this Scrivener7 Yesterday #136

What about having men police themselves? How many men call out other men for their hateful comments and threats? ihaveaquestion Yesterday #86

You used the word "male." Is that not derogatory, yet "female" is? Doodley Yesterday #109

You think you scored a big point there, don't you? Scrivener7 Yesterday #135

Using "male" as an adjective rather than a noun is appropriate. Here's a link spooky3 Yesterday #143

That's your response to a call for men to be responsible? WTF!?!?! ihaveaquestion 22 hrs ago #177

I doubt there are many men on this forum who disagree that there are men who are disrespectful to women, and Doodley 20 hrs ago #186

Worse by orders of magnitude. SKKY 21 hrs ago #179

Why anyone still uses any Zuckerberg product is beyond me. No one needs that and they're Scrivener7 Yesterday #3

Quit FB years ago. Never went on Instagram. Ritabert Yesterday #7

Same here, and I'm a 78-year-old man with a wife and sisters. Email, and DU is the extent of my online activity. usaf-vet Yesterday #52

Same here. Ritabert Yesterday #88

Stop Greg_In_SF Yesterday #4

Good Point ProfessorGAC Yesterday #5

Any forum with inadequate moderation is quickly hijacked by men and boys... hunter Yesterday #60

Right blubunyip Yesterday #73

Then, at the very least, there needs to be a movement demanding adequate moderation. Scrivener7 Yesterday #80

Not sure this equates. Hope22 Yesterday #12

Post removed Post removed Yesterday #14

So, basically, kudzukimchi Yesterday #19

Really, dude? Welcome to DU. Scrivener7 Yesterday #21

I just knew Greg_In_SF Yesterday #23

Agree Mossfern Yesterday #41

Well said! csusan Yesterday #42

She's 15. All kids are on social media. Joinfortmill Yesterday #31

Again, it's Greg_In_SF Yesterday #35

Not quite. Joinfortmill Yesterday #39

Umm... Greg_In_SF Yesterday #40

That's Boomer logic Polybius Yesterday #63

Yes blubunyip Yesterday #75

It brought back the memory of then PM Golda Meir's response when men suggested she enact a curfew for women Attilatheblond Yesterday #127

Similar to get the red out Yesterday #128

But, it seems, there are only two available options: leave the source, or demand Scrivener7 Yesterday #83

I'm not going to pretend to have a solution, but this is not just about social media spaces. Ilikepurple Yesterday #144

I'm in no way dismissive of her concerns. And I've said elsewhere in the thread Scrivener7 Yesterday #149

The issue is that the abuse does not stop online. The piece was a plea for change not a request for personal advice Ilikepurple 23 hrs ago #161

I'm not dismissing anything. I never said anything about the banning children idea being outlandish, in fact Scrivener7 23 hrs ago #163

I'm sorry. I apologize for mixing some of your comments with another member. Ilikepurple 21 hrs ago #178

Have a nice night. Scrivener7 21 hrs ago #180

Boys will stop that behaviour when they find out it is not cool, when there is no one on social media, besides Escurumbele Yesterday #26

Victim blaming much? You're kidding, right? Joinfortmill Yesterday #33

Amazing to me how the victim is always held responsible because "we all know men can't help speaking ... marble falls Yesterday #58

This message was self-deleted by its author blubunyip Yesterday #76

Please explain how the post is "victim blaming." Doodley Yesterday #119

Telling girls to get off social media doesn't solve the problem and it's a bit like spooky3 Yesterday #130

Progressive Democrats don't develop lifelong issues with self-esteem and trust Scrivener7 Yesterday #138

Notice that I said it's "a bit like", not "exactly like." spooky3 Yesterday #142

Do you see anything being done that indicates the bad behavior is being discouraged? Scrivener7 Yesterday #145

When I first stopped using X and started using Threads, spooky3 Yesterday #146

So there are places these kids could go and be safe instead of instagram. I wish they would. Scrivener7 Yesterday #151

Instagram is linked to Threads, but she could just ignore Instagram spooky3 Yesterday #155

We could just tell kids all their parents are on instagram. That'll send them running away. Scrivener7 Yesterday #156

LOL! Nt spooky3 23 hrs ago #158

Women once needed escorts to enter taverns leftstreet Yesterday #27

Right because some men can't seem to control thenselves Joinfortmill Yesterday #34

Paint Greg_In_SF Yesterday #45

"Some men" is a wide brush? Wednesdays Yesterday #53

As wide a brush as "stay off the internet. Problem solved!"? Torchlight Yesterday #61

This centurys version of homegirl Yesterday #103

As one man, I didn't feel the brush came very close to painting me. Ilikepurple 23 hrs ago #164

Or Greg_In_SF Yesterday #43

Instagram isn't CAUSING her problems leftstreet Yesterday #79

Your interlocutor has left the thread Prairie Gates Yesterday #92

So what do you do to protect your fifteen year old daughter from this right now? Scrivener7 Yesterday #106

I don't know leftstreet Yesterday #114

We do have that history. But I'm not seeing the will to apply it to social media. Scrivener7 Yesterday #129

I'm not sure you could make a ban on using instagram stick for a 15-year-old. MineralMan Yesterday #123

Yes. Your response is unsatisfactory because it's amazingly naive. "Calling out" these assaults has never done anything Scrivener7 Yesterday #131

Doing what i can.. MineralMan Yesterday #139

"the problem is undisciplined girls" blubunyip Yesterday #81

What do you suggest? Imagine you're this fifteen year old's mother. What do you do? Scrivener7 Yesterday #105

Come together with other mothers, fathers, daughters AND sons blubunyip Yesterday #116

I totally agree. There should be a major protest against this. But there isn't. I can't fathom why. But there isn't. Scrivener7 Yesterday #132

This isn't a woman. This is a child. And she is being abused. I'd forbid instagram in a heartbeat. Scrivener7 Yesterday #111

Well yes! leftstreet Yesterday #117

Absolutely. We only get better products when we demand better products. And sometimes Scrivener7 Yesterday #133

Stop johnp3907 Yesterday #108

She's not a woman. She's a child. And she's being abused. What would you do to stop that Scrivener7 Yesterday #112

Social media is a pretty damn big neighborhood Quiet Em Yesterday #122

iI's not just a matter of social media.. whathehell 23 hrs ago #166

These repulsive little worms... GiqueCee Yesterday #6

"Suppose social media platforms required them to use their REAL names, and not some made-up handle." MichMan Yesterday #55

If women used their names they'd be seriously shit-stormed and doxxed. marble falls Yesterday #59

Good point... GiqueCee Yesterday #95

No... GiqueCee Yesterday #85

Sounds really serious Torchlight Yesterday #93

The military has always used 'girl'as a means of humilating men. milestogo Yesterday #8

Today's bright moment of clarity -- right here. Duncan Grant Yesterday #102

The juvenile males who own and run social media are intentionally responsible for this. Clouds Passing Yesterday #9

Let's not forget how Zuckerberg got his start. llmart Yesterday #13

He's a creepster Clouds Passing Yesterday #16

I don't think Zuck ever had a GF..... SergeStorms Yesterday #38

From Wiki... llmart Yesterday #66

Wow. SergeStorms Yesterday #152

You use the word "males," but female is an insult? Please explain. Doodley Yesterday #113

I didn't say or imply that female is an insult Clouds Passing 23 hrs ago #159

Dehumanizing hatred at such a young age seems difficult to avoid in the 21 century Torchlight Yesterday #10

Yes, exactly. MineralMan Yesterday #22

Yes. It's victim blaming n/t Just_Vote_Dem Yesterday #49

But don't. Scrivener7 Yesterday #78

That is true in many, many cases. MineralMan Yesterday #90

Women, myself included, have spent lifetimes doing that. And yet here we are. Scrivener7 Yesterday #91

OK, but I'll continue to call out sexism and misogyny when I encounter it. MineralMan Yesterday #96

We all do that. You are not unique in that. It doesn't change anything about the abuse this child is facing. Scrivener7 Yesterday #98

And after all these years of doing it Bettie Yesterday #99

I just said the same downthread. I think we're all feeling that. Scrivener7 Yesterday #100

+1 leftstreet Yesterday #25

My sentiments exactly Mossfern Yesterday #48

Telling people to avoid social media is as absurd Torchlight Yesterday #50

Imagine she is your child. Are you going to feel like the solution is to wait until the culture Scrivener7 Yesterday #97

I share your concern about keeping youth safe from harmful online content. Torchlight Yesterday #101

I totally agree. But in the meantime, my kid would not be allowed to go near it. Scrivener7 Yesterday #104

My heart goes out to the girls and young women. Hope22 Yesterday #11

Even nice men often see it as a "woman's problem" blubunyip Yesterday #84

Are you saying no men joined in the fight to protect Roe V. Wade? Doodley Yesterday #121

Please..... Hope22 Yesterday #137

Do you think tens of millions of Democratic men don't stand up for women's rights? Come on! Please! Doodley Yesterday #141

I'm semi retired now. WinstonSmith4740 Yesterday #15

Did you also have the same restriction to the usage of "males" MichMan Yesterday #56

Absolutely!! WinstonSmith4740 Yesterday #82

So we should all be banned from using the words male and female except for the animal kingdom? Are you kidding? Doodley Yesterday #118

...... Diamond_Dog Yesterday #17

Amen Joinfortmill Yesterday #36

Please! I am a man who respects women. Every Thanksgiving dinner I make a speech that I want to see more women Doodley Yesterday #120

That's great. Quiet Em Yesterday #124

It says "men," not some men, not certain men, not a small percentage of men, but "men." Doodley Yesterday #125

She did not say all men either. Quiet Em Yesterday #134

Please! If I said "women are a problem," does that sound okay to you? I don't think that is acceptable. Doodley Yesterday #140

Let's stay in the context of the topic and discussion on this thread Quiet Em Yesterday #150

She isn't a "young girl." She's 15. Doodley Yesterday #157

She's 15. She is a girl, sir. Quiet Em 23 hrs ago #160

She isn't a young girl. She takes offense at "female," so at least, let's not call her a "young girl." Doodley 20 hrs ago #184

I have no idea what you are talking about. Quiet Em 19 hrs ago #188

Yawn. The not-all-men argument---like we haven't heard that before. CrispyQ 21 hrs ago #181

If I said "women are the problem," would you say that was acceptable? I would not ever say that as it is offensive and Doodley 20 hrs ago #185

I didn't feel tarred. I'm not sure why you think this is about you. Ilikepurple 22 hrs ago #175

Do you know what my race is? Where I was born? If I have a disability? What my religion is? No. Please don't stereotype Doodley 20 hrs ago #187

I'm not sure I spoke to any of those things other than mentioning marginalization. Ilikepurple 18 hrs ago #191

I don't have Instagram and have never used it but I have had Facebook Bev54 Yesterday #18

With very few exceptions, "Social" media are pure poison. usonian Yesterday #20

DU is my only social media... BigmanPigman Yesterday #28

This is horrifying. What kind of men are we raising? Joinfortmill Yesterday #29

Trump acolytes. Wednesdays Yesterday #51

The same ones we have always raised. 1WorldHope Yesterday #74

Ding, ding, ding, THAT IS THE POINT! Buddyzbuddy Yesterday #89

It makes me think of a book I read FullySupportDems Yesterday #30

That was my 2nd Tepper novel. CrispyQ 21 hrs ago #182

I was called a "cuck" yesterday on X by a woman defending Tuckers Mosby Yesterday #32

Wracking my puny "female brain" xuplate Yesterday #37

I completely understand why many women may want to have little to do with men. Sometimes it seems like men are a blight Fil1957 Yesterday #44

I get that entirely. I do not crowd women or children because I don't want to cause them fear that I am one ... marble falls Yesterday #69

I don't think I've ever seen you stray even into the neighborhood of mansplaining. Scrivener7 Yesterday #154

My mistake was thinking providing background was a "service". I've had to learn to wait to be asked for ... marble falls 1 hr ago #198

Social media is a great source of people, families to keep in touch. It's beautiful. BUT bluestarone Yesterday #46

Women Keep A Body Count???? Coolgoober Yesterday #47

Incels think this about women, and they're pissed because they aren't getting in on anyone's count at all. marble falls Yesterday #67

Facebook is cancer JoseBalow Yesterday #54

Thank you for sharing. Martin68 Yesterday #62

Even my husband gets the Proverbial Pissed Off when he hears how some men think of females. chouchou Yesterday #64

Boys jump at that shit in a nanosecond GenThePerservering Yesterday #65

Parents need to teach their boys Bettie Yesterday #68

We can't fix this online. It starts at home and in school. marble falls Yesterday #72

That's true Bettie Yesterday #87

But that means this fifteen year old has to endure this until the culture changes. Scrivener7 Yesterday #94

The kids need better tools GenThePerservering Yesterday #107

I'm speaking as someone whose only social media is DU, so I understand that I am Scrivener7 Yesterday #110

You're fighting the good fight here Sympthsical 23 hrs ago #162

I wonder if people who grew up with this will be more careful with their own children. Scrivener7 23 hrs ago #165

The parents my age are much more aware of it Sympthsical 22 hrs ago #169

I LOVE that idea of a flip phone for school! And I love to hear there is more healthy fear of this shit. Scrivener7 22 hrs ago #171

Absolutely, but problems will beget problems Sympthsical 22 hrs ago #172

This is just the beginning. AI will do the rest. Scrivener7 22 hrs ago #173

The parents of your niece did the right thing. Quiet Em 23 hrs ago #167

It's in the frigging algorithms. This is how Zuckerberg makes his money. Scrivener7 22 hrs ago #168

AI and filters aren't going to make it any better Sympthsical 22 hrs ago #174

The net has warped human perceptions of reality jfz9580m Yesterday #71

I'll be watching for those posts about your epiphanies. It sounds interesting. Scrivener7 22 hrs ago #170

They are hard to explain jfz9580m 18 hrs ago #192

Well it isn't anything that amazing jfz9580m 9 hrs ago #193

My head is spinning a bit from this. I agree with you that the ones doing the work seem to be the ones who Scrivener7 7 hrs ago #195

And god forgive an action movie features a woman or person of color..only a white male can save the world BlueWaveNeverEnd Yesterday #77

Instagram and Facebook MorbidButterflyTat Yesterday #115

Screw social media popsdenver Yesterday #126

Easy to see why we've had no female presidents stollen Yesterday #147

I talked my daughter out of the Annapolis, her ex-husband is an Air Force Academy graduate, who was ... marble falls 1 hr ago #197

This message was self-deleted by its author Mosby Yesterday #148

OMG MorbidButterflyTat Yesterday #153

What's so funny? marble falls 1 hr ago #196

The beauty of posts like this drmeow 22 hrs ago #176

Sad to see. REALLY sad to see! calimary 20 hrs ago #183

Read a fascinating diagnosis of the problem. summer_in_TX 18 hrs ago #190

I don't understand this maxrandb 8 hrs ago #194