My Grandmother's words, on the idea of faith in dark times like these... [View all]

I'm not particularly religious. Most of what I feel on the matter was probably first sparked by my grandmother when I was just a kid. Visiting us in California, all the way from Central America, she initially terrified me. At the time, she was already well into her 70s. In the eyes of a seven year old, she was ancient. Her mere existence was mystical and foreboding. Even now, I'm ashamed to say that my first inclination was to hide. Later, curious as to this person now residing in a bedroom left spare by a teenaged brother now serving aboard an aircraft carrier in the Pacific, I found myself peeking in on her as she watched an old western on a twelve inch black and white television. Her gaze turned to me, a single arthritic finger curling, gesturing for me to enter. And, I did.

Other than introducing me to John Huston the director though, my Grandmother also introduced me to the notions of faith and why a person might choose to believe. One night after dinner, after the whole family had retreated to the living room to talk, someone asked her whether she thought there was a God. Maybe the question was asked because we'd recently lost a family member - my Mom's sister who was also my Grandmother's eldest daughter. In Latin families, the idea that a spirit, a soul, might linger for a while before finding its final destination is not the least bit unusual. All about us, Aunt Dora was still with us, at least temporarily. Occasionally, if you knew what you were looking for, she even left small signs of her presence about the house.

Her Spanish translated for me, I'll never forget how my Grandmother addressed this question of whether there was a God. She began by saying that she knew there was an evil force that did exist and that perhaps this is what we mean when we refer to the Devil. Whatever that evil was, she had witnessed it on at least one occasion. Though the words were translated, the tone of my Grandmother's voice conveyed a certainty worthy of a chill up my spine. And then, as seriously as she'd spoken of an infinite darkness , she explained that she chose to believe in an alternative, an infinite light that balanced out the evil. For her, that was God. She didn't need to believe in such a thing. But, as she said, without such a belief, there would be no hope, only despair.

At present, the Devil might well be on the loose - Not just in the U.S, but in the world at large. But, he isn't alone. He can be balanced out. We have to believe this, that there is an infinite light out of what now feels like infinite darkness.