It was Christmastime at Little Rotten Donald Trump's house

He went to his mom to ask for paper and pen to write to Santa.

"Little Rotten Donnie, you've been so bad this year Santa won't listen to you. You'd be better off writing to the Baby Jesus."

With a ream of paper and a pen, he sat down to write:

"Dear Baby Jesus, I want lots of presents and I promise to be good all year."

No. You can't lie to Baby Jesus. He threw that letter away and wrote:

"Dear Baby Jesus, I want lots of presents and I promise to be good all month."

Still no. By the time he got down to promising to be good for a nanosecond he decided this wasn't the right way to do it.

So...he got a cigar box and a roll of toilet paper. He went to the nativity scene in the living room. He carefully picked up the Madonna and wrapped her in toilet paper, put the wrapped figurine in the box, and buried it in the back yard. Then he went back to his writing.

"Dear Baby Jesus, if you ever want to see your mother again..."