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FakeNoose

(40,455 posts)
Mon Jan 26, 2026, 10:00 AM 17 hrs ago

The Borowitz Report: She Destroyed Trump



Link: https://www.borowitzreport.com/p/bishop-budde-one-year-later

I have no intention of marking the first anniversary of Trump’s Inauguration. That would be like marking the anniversary of testing positive for herpes.

Instead, I’d like to honor the first anniversary of Bishop Mariann Edgar Budde’s remarkable sermon at last year’s National Prayer Service. In light of the horrors Trump and his enablers have inflicted on the USA and the world in just twelve months, her words are more relevant than ever. Shortly after Budde delivered her sermon, performative Christian Mike Johnson posted a furious rant on X.

“Bishop Budde hijacked the National Prayer Service to promote her radical ideology,” the House Speaker charged. “This was an opportunity to unify the country in prayer, but she used it to sow division. Even worse, she’s continued her political crusade in media interviews. Shameful.”

It’s hard to imagine who besides Johnson would consider Budde’s pro-mercy stance “radical ideology,” except maybe the late, great Hannibal Lecter and his number one fan.

But since the mainstream media have taught us that there are two sides to every issue, today I’m hosting a debate between Budde and Johnson on the true meaning of the Bible. Read the following real quotations and then vote on who understands the Bible better:

Bishop Budde: “In the name of our God, I ask you to have mercy upon the people in our country who are scared now. There are gay, lesbian and transgender children in Democratic, Republican, and Independent families, some who fear for their lives.”

Mike Johnson: “All of us should acknowledge the real emotion and strife of the homosexual lifestyle... But our government can never provide its stamp of approval or special legal sanction for behavior patterns that are proven to be destructive to individuals, to families and to society at large.”

“Homosexuals have the right to live however they choose but they cannot redefine marriage for our entire society. The stakes are very high in this battle, and it is not ‘intolerance’ for us to desire a healthy and prosperous community.”

“Same-sex ‘marriage’ selfishly and deliberately deprives children of either a mother or a father.” “A man cannot become a woman.”
- more at link -

Andy Borowitz, biblical scholar and ace humor columnist, continues with several more quotes from Bishop Budde and Mike Johnson to prove his point. Please read the rest on today's The Borowitz Report.

Please note that only paid TBR subscribers can participate in the poll, but we DUers can play along here. If you could vote in the TBR poll, what would you say?

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The Borowitz Report: She Destroyed Trump (Original Post) FakeNoose 17 hrs ago OP
K&R LetMyPeopleVote 17 hrs ago #1
I wonder what Mike Johnson would think of My Three Sons from 1965? Wiz Imp 16 hrs ago #2

Wiz Imp

(9,156 posts)
2. I wonder what Mike Johnson would think of My Three Sons from 1965?
Mon Jan 26, 2026, 10:50 AM
16 hrs ago

I've recently been watching the show on the Catchy Comedy Channel. As the show moved from Black & White to Color in 1965, the oldest son got married and the Douglass's adopted Ernie, Chip's friend who was an orphan in foster care. They did a whole 3 show storyline of how they wanted to adopt Ernie but the rules wouldn't allow it "without a woman in the house". Eventually the social workers and judge realized that Uncle Charlie provided everything including love to the child that a mother would and the adoption was approved. So a very popular TV show 60 years ago realized and promoted the fact that the most important thing needed in a family was love, regardless of the sex or gender of the rest of the members of the family. Yet bigots like Mike Johnson remain stuck more than 60 years in the past and can't handle it. Funny how there was no major backlash at MyThree Sons for setting up this situation over 60 years ago. In that way, the bigots have actually regressed and are worse now than they were then.

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