General Discussion

Mme. Defarge

(8,598 posts) Thu Jan 16, 2025, 06:09 PM Jan 16

Andy Borowitz for The Contrarian -

In his first post for The Contrarian, Andy Borowitz offers creative editorial assistance to Jeff Bezos
ANDY BOROWITZ
JAN 16

In an effort to broaden its appeal, the Washington Post has changed its slogan from “Democracy Dies in Darkness” to
“Riveting Storytelling for All of America.” The following are six runner-up slogans that were in strong contention:
The Kid Rock of Newspapers

Every Subscription Comes With Free Trump Bible

All the News by Writers Who Haven’t Quit

News? Fuck Yeah!

Ten Millionth Subscriber Gets to Ride in Bezos’s Rocket

Release the Kraken

Editor’s note: We want your slogans, too! Please share at info@contrariannews.org. Our favorite will get a shoutout.

14 replies

= new reply since forum marked as read

Highlight:

Andy Borowitz for The Contrarian - (Original Post) Mme. Defarge Jan 16 OP

All the news that's fake to print nt Wicked Blue Jan 16 #1

Out news won't make you snooze nt Mme. Defarge Jan 16 #2

"I've looked at news from both sides now" muriel_volestrangler Jan 16 #3

I think Joni Mitchell would smile. . . . nt Bernardo de La Paz Jan 16 #6

Then she'd march. NewLarry Jan 16 #10

The best mulletwrapper money can buy Geechie Jan 16 #4

Democracy dies in darkenss...but it gets buried under money. Volaris Jan 16 #5

The Washington Compost David Boyle Jan 16 #7

Not fit HighFired49 Jan 16 #8

The Tesla of newspapers David Boyle Jan 16 #9

The Giuliani of lawyers. MLAA Jan 16 #11

"Washington Times? HOLD OUR BEER." 50 Shades Of Blue Jan 16 #12

At least it wasn't to hold something else David Boyle Jan 16 #13

Scamazon David Boyle Jan 16 #14

Wicked Blue

(6,951 posts)

1. All the news that's fake to print nt

Reply to Mme. Defarge (Original post)

Thu Jan 16, 2025, 06:47 PM

Jan 16

Mme. Defarge

(8,598 posts)

2. Out news won't make you snooze nt

Reply to Wicked Blue (Reply #1)

Thu Jan 16, 2025, 06:49 PM

Jan 16

muriel_volestrangler

(102,858 posts)

3. "I've looked at news from both sides now"

Reply to Mme. Defarge (Original post)

Thu Jan 16, 2025, 06:55 PM

Jan 16

"From left and right and still somehow
It's who's in power that I recall
I really don't know news at all"

Bernardo de La Paz

(52,056 posts)

6. I think Joni Mitchell would smile. . . . nt

Reply to muriel_volestrangler (Reply #3)

Thu Jan 16, 2025, 07:32 PM

Jan 16

NewLarry

(67 posts)

10. Then she'd march.

Reply to Bernardo de La Paz (Reply #6)

Thu Jan 16, 2025, 08:07 PM

Jan 16

Geechie

(979 posts)

4. The best mulletwrapper money can buy

Reply to Mme. Defarge (Original post)

Thu Jan 16, 2025, 07:13 PM

Jan 16

Volaris

(10,713 posts)

5. Democracy dies in darkenss...but it gets buried under money.

Reply to Mme. Defarge (Original post)

Thu Jan 16, 2025, 07:25 PM

Jan 16

David Boyle

(732 posts)

7. The Washington Compost

Reply to Mme. Defarge (Original post)

Thu Jan 16, 2025, 07:41 PM

Jan 16

A real big heap... of.....

HighFired49

(393 posts)

8. Not fit

Reply to Mme. Defarge (Original post)

Thu Jan 16, 2025, 07:43 PM

Jan 16

All the "News" That's Not Fit to Print

David Boyle

(732 posts)

9. The Tesla of newspapers

Reply to Mme. Defarge (Original post)

Thu Jan 16, 2025, 07:54 PM

Jan 16

Enjoy the explosion!

MLAA

(18,805 posts)

11. The Giuliani of lawyers.

Reply to Mme. Defarge (Original post)

Thu Jan 16, 2025, 08:24 PM

Jan 16

50 Shades Of Blue

(11,044 posts)

12. "Washington Times? HOLD OUR BEER."

Reply to Mme. Defarge (Original post)

Thu Jan 16, 2025, 09:07 PM

Jan 16

David Boyle

(732 posts)

13. At least it wasn't to hold something else

Reply to 50 Shades Of Blue (Reply #12)

Thu Jan 16, 2025, 09:09 PM

Jan 16

. . .

David Boyle

(732 posts)

14. Scamazon

Reply to Mme. Defarge (Original post)

Thu Jan 16, 2025, 09:41 PM

Jan 16

"All the news that's s[p]it to print"

"Bezos' Bullspit"

"You buy, we lie!" "...You DIE!!"

(BTW, maybe Mme. Defarge should send this whole post of hers to Borowitz at info@contrariannews.org ...)

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